It was the last couple of months of High School. I was to go away for college about 6 hours away from NYC, I was 18. I met this one guy, he wasn't perfect...at all, and I definitely was NOT attracted to him whatsoever. But we hung out, just to hang out. I thought of him as a brother, but he was really into me. I told him straight up that I didn't want to have a bf/gf relationship with him, cause I didn't feel that way. But he kept on pursuing it, and so I gave in, and gave him a chance (thinking this would go no where). But that thought led to a 2 year relationship.
After a few weeks of dating, I had lost my virginity to him, and a few months after that, I was in love (or so I thought). I thought I loved him so much to the point where I even got a tattoo of his name on my ankle (yea, I know...I was young!). But it was hard being in a long distance relationship, especially since this was my first actual boyfriend (any relationship under 6 months didn't really count to me).
When I was up at school, I would fly back down to NYC to be with him for a weekend, every 2 weeks (of course he paid for it). It was exhausting and I felt it was unfair for me to be the one that travels, but I did it anyway, because...I loved him. Sophomore year rolled around and I realized that I didn't love him as much as he loved me. I could see that he did "love" me that much...even though I wasn't allowed to go to clubs with my friends, nor did we hang out with them because he thought that they were "stupid". So all we really do stay at home and hung out with HIS friends at night. I felt like I was on lock-down.
I didn't realize what he was doing to me, until my friends opened my eyes. I found myself, after almost 2 years of being lost. I finally got the courage to confront him, then he laid his hands on me, and I walked out. No saying goodbye, no turning my head back, I just walked right out the door. I found myself lost again, thinking how I let this happen to myself. I loved him so much at one point, I left home for him, and started a feud with my family.
Afterwards, I found someone new (my current boyfriend), who today, I've been with for the past 3 1/2 years. This time, I waited...for everything. I wanted to make sure he was someone I wanted to be with, someone who will love me back and will always be there for me. Someone who was open minded, someone who wants to hangout with my friends. And he is the one. The only problem is, his mother hates me cause she doesn't think I'm good enough for him. When I say, "good enough", I mean, not pretty enough, not skinny enough, not smart enough, not as "wealthy" as her family...and the list goes on. But I'm still with my boyfriend because he showed me what true love is. He's not perfect either, but he RESPECTS me.
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Should you breakup because his mom hates you?
I've been with the love of my life for a bit over 3 and a half years now. We first started dating while we were in school and about a 6 hour drive from home. After about 4 months of dating, we decided that we wanted to get serious with each other, so we told our parents that we were dating someone. The semester ends and we're ready to go flown blown with our summer plans (after I finish pledging first). So he comes over to Brooklyn and has dinner with my family at a nice restaurant down the block, they love him. I go over to his place to have dinner, his mom questions me about...everything.
In the end, I thought it went great! But over a couple of weeks, I "collected" information about how his family felt about me. Everybody liked me, except for his mom. She thought that I wasn't good enough for him, she thought that I was too fat, that my family wasn't as wealthy as her, that I wasn't smart enough, and definitely thought that I wasn't as pretty enough nor as pretty as her 50 year old butt (UGH!).
But I tried not to give it a second thought cause I knew how his mom was. She's the type of person who thinks she's better in everything and anything, than everybody else, unless you can prove her wrong, that's how she's going to be. Over the past few years, I've ignored her the best I could, but there were a handful of times that I just couldn't take it anymore!!
When she met my parents, she was not only rude, but obnoxious, ignore my parents and me, and invited her cousin to come along. WTF?!?! (There were more worse events but let me just mention this one, or I might just explode in anger while writing this post.)These are the times where I just couldn't stand it, and believed that I would make my life so much better if I wasn't dating him, so I wouldn't have to deal with a dispicable person like his mom.
But after every situation like that, I would just brush it off and pretend like it never happened and make the best of it; because I was in love. I love my boyfriend, and no matter how much I hate his mom and vice versa, I will always love my boyfriend for the way HE is and how HE treats me. So in my opinion, NO, his mom should not be the reason for you to breakup with him. He did nothing wrong, it was not his choice to be born to a mother like that. Just love him, and if you ever get married to that man, feel happy, be happy, and remember, you'll be marrying him, you're with him...not the mother.